where did everyone go?

by | Mar 16, 2019 | All | 0 comments

16 Mar 2019

Its sad when people lose their lives. A few days ago, a crazed group of terrorists, and make no mistake they are terrorists… They shot 49 people most of them losing their lives. And yes, this loss of life was terrible, I felt pain for such a senseless loss of life and so did the entire world. So many lives lost….

Let’s go a little closer to home, Queensland, the state I live in. The murder rate in Queensland Australia for 2016 to 2017 was 38 murders across both years, 19 a year. 38 Tragic lives lost, the number makes us cringe, each murder on the news makes us sad it doesn’t matter if it was a drug related murder or a domestic violence related death it’s sad and we have an outpouring of support and hope and donations to families to help them through the tough time.


That number though is low in comparison to car crash deaths in QLD Alone, 250 people die in motor vehicle accidents every year. 250 sets of families and their friends affected by tragic accidents. Again, we pour out support and donations and we talk about it we have ads on TV telling us to slow down, don’t drink and drive as well as the fatal 5…. All to try and stop the senseless loss of innocent life.


One last number. 804.

In Qld in 2017, 804 people died by suicide.


No out pouring of grief by the community as a whole.

No charity hand outs to the families struggling to come to terms with the loss of their loved one.

In Fact, just the mere mention of Suicide and charity and people run away! I unfortunately just experience this phenomenon myself today. People wanting to help a charity fundraiser until the word suicide is mentioned and they RUN….

Why as a community, do we hide from this topic or run when its mentioned?

Suicide is weak! Suicide is Selfish! Suicide is horrible and graphic!

Suicide is confronting and scary sometimes death by suicide can be graphic and brutal and devastating to families…. But so is a car crash and they show enactments of those on the news and in tv ads to slow down or not drink drive.

Its weak, FAR FROM IT. If you have ever met a person deep into a struggle with suicidal thoughts, you will know they are not weak. We as Suicidal people fight a battle in our minds every day, we fight to live, and we fight fucking hard! Those of us who attempt and those of us who succeed we are not weak we fight till our last breath. We lose battles and attempt, and some lose the war and succeed. BUT WE ARE NOT WEAK, WE ARE BRAVE, AND WE ARE STRONG.

Selfish….” that person who killed themselves was selfish! They didn’t care about their family or friends. They didn’t care about anyone but themselves. Selfish cowards.”

Selfish? NOT EVEN CLOSE! In fact, we as suicidal people think the exact opposite, in our minds we are convinced our families will be happier and better of with out us and the burden we feel we are on them. We are not selfish we are sick, and, in our minds, we are being selfless.

I guess what I am trying to say is why? why are we shunned spoken of in hushed tones or run away from? We are not scary! We are sick you do not run away from cancer, do you? no you throw millions of dollars into finding a cure only not everyone has cancer or will get cancer and some of us will be lucky enough to not even be touched by it in our lifetime. Yet every single person alive will have thoughts of suicide. Half of you reading this just scoffed and called me a dick head. Now stop and look back over your life with what I said in mind….

Now tell me not once in your life have you had a thought of suicide. “it’s all too hard, I can’t do it anymore I wish I was dead…” or “kill me now”. All of you just realised that you have had a suicidal thought at some point in your life. Ok so it was tiny and insignificant in your scheme of things, but it was still a suicidal thought. We all have these thoughts it is just to varying degrees.

I heard a story last week about a lady who lived a perfect happy life who in one week lost both her husband and her son… within a week she spiralled so deeply into depression that all she wanted was to take her life……. she survived.

But it goes to show you that any one of us at any point in time can be affected by suicide be it circumstance or mental illness. So, stop treating us like the plague. Bring us into the open. TALK WITH US, help those affected to feel comfortable enough to speak up and say HEY, HELP ME LIVE! We can save hundreds of lives if we just stop being afraid of a word, if we just stop running away. Suicide is not a dirty word and it needs to be spoken about as a community.

We can make a difference by just not running away standing up and talking about suicide.

Written by:

Ben Russoniello | ©benrussoniello 2019


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